Smut Club

well hello All You Beautiful

[Music]

People you know what time it

is ladies and gents Guys and Dolls and

everyone in

between gather around get you something

real nice to sip on and comfy to slip

on cuz it's time for smut Club here's

your hosts Chelsey and

[Applause]

Hannah hi everybody and welcome to Smart

club I'm Hannah and I'm

Chelsea welcome yeah so glad you're here

Hannah what do we do here this is the

podcast where we sit around occasionally

daydrink and talk about

smut yeah yeah all types of smut all

types so many smut options all kinds

today we're going to be doing holiday

smut whoop whoop

because I don't think you guys are

Fanatics in this way but like Vance and

I have realized we're like oh we are

those Christmas people we are those

Christmas [ __ ] and I I know it and I

own it I have a tattoo that has a Santa

Claus cap on it yes you do you know yeah

I can I can own who I am we are those

people for Halloween I have a Jack

Skellington

Tattoo do you guys have one of those

like 12T skeletons in your yard we don't

we've talked about

it we've talked about it we also talked

about a 9 foot Jack Skellington but we

went with a um an inflatable Pennywise

from it for our yard this year with a

little sign that says is it Halloween

yet and then Matt got how tall is

inflatable Pennywise oh not that tall

like five feet and does an inflatable

Pennywise make Pennywise less yes it's

more cartoonish yeah and then Matt got

multiple laser pointers for the house

that do like different little laser oh

shows of ghosts and little things kind

of like the ones that like almost like

the little like mini projectors that

kind of go in your yard and like do it

on the side of your house okay and we've

done a haunted garage before I don't

know that we'll do that this year I

didn't know you guys did a haunted

garage yeah does a whole thing it's a

lot he does a whole thing with the um a

a fog machine and he like rigged it up

to go through a cooler to cool down the

fog so that it would stay low to the

ground oh yeah so that's how they make

the fog stay low which makes sense you

can buy ones that are like extremely

expensive that do that automatically but

he just did it with an old cooler from

the Walmart so like were those people

for Hol Halloween but not for

Christmas well and I

guess I don't actually give a [ __ ] about

Christmas

Day for being a Christmas person I make

Christmas season person like we put our

tree up on our anniversary which is in

mid- October every year cuz I just like

the vibe right it's up right now it is

thought um I cuz I really like the vibe

and I love getting to pick out gifts for

people okay like I am that person where

if I see something in like March that

I'm like oh Vance would maybe like this

I will add it to my running list of

things and then Circle back when it's

time to buy gifts and be like okay is

this still a good idea or was this just

a good idea nine months ago MH and I do

that all the time like with everyone

there are spreadsh sheets to keep track

of gifts

like well you have to know your budget

per person person what you've already

purchased is it delivered has it if it's

already been delivered did you already

wrap it oh wow there's conditional

formatting I'm I'm noting that yeah yes

see Matt and I don't do that we usually

do like um we will give each other

things like concert tickets or like

things like that more so I actually um a

band we really like is coming in

February and so I took a screenshot of

it and sent it to him and was like for

your birthday and he was like damn it

babe I already got these for you for

Christmas and I was like well I'm really

glad I asked first because we would have

had a lot of tickets to the dead South

so like but it is so sweet that you guys

were going to gift each other the same

thing no I was like well we're really

cute so Vance and I for each other each

year we do four gifts we do something

you want something you need something to

wear something to read read oh cute and

that has Honestly made it so much easier

yeah um especi cuz I like I feel like

you like hit a point and you're like I I

don't really need anything and like

having some clear boundaries and

Direction yeah so easy right um so then

it like I literally said to Vance

yesterday I was like okay I have um

you're something to wear narrow down to

two options and he's like we're it's not

the holidays yet but our trees up and

I'm like yeah so which one I was like

I'm not going to show them to you but if

I just Loosely describe them which of

these would you be

into but I also think the spreadsheets

didn't start until I married

Vance um there's more extended family to

track yes and Vance was very much like

cuz his sister is 14 years older than

him so he was very much just used to

showing up as the fun uncle where

they're like just give us 50 bucks and

we put your name on this do gift that

they're going to be stoked about and was

not like he will rap anything I put in

front of him he's just like not he does

not find the joy in finding the right

gifts for

people um and so then when I had to

start figuring out everyone's gifts I'm

like I'm like [ __ ] we're five adults and

two kids deep on my side I think like on

you know just like when you start adding

up people and you're like cool we're in

double digit people how much does that

mean Budget wise per person

so while I do Laugh at My systems in

place now cuz I recognize they sound

ridiculous we've also needed the systems

because there were just too many people

to buy gifts for the systems work the

systems work right yes um last year when

I was stupid pregnant Vance did tell me

cuz like each year I'll choose a

different like rapping paper theme and

like get matching ribbon and it's like

the wrapping is like a big everyone's

gifts look very nice M um and last year

I'd seen like a couple of Tik toks of

like cool rapping Trends to try and

Vance was like absolutely [ __ ] not

you are8 and a half months pregnant

which means I'm going to have to learn

this stupid [ __ ] rapping [ __ ] and I'm

not agreeing to that he's like I'm not

willing to put in that kind of

commitment to this no he's like I'll rap

whatever you put in front of me or I'm

putting it in a box and you can get

tissue paper and boxes he's like but you

cannot tell me this cross-hatching paper

pattern [ __ ] that and the horse it rode

in on not doing it what about the the

hering bone one did you see that one

yeah so the thing about that one cuz I

tried

it you need a

specific shaped gift ah like because of

the way in which the paper fell and I'm

sure there are people far more skilled

at me who are like it doesn't matter

it's very doable but I was very much

struggling where I'm like am I not

getting enough paper um but it just

frequently didn't look like it was

supposed to and a lot of that's probably

user

error understandable did you try that

one or did you just look at it and go

people are so extra out here and then

I'm their target audience Matt does all

of that he gets really excited to shop

for his nieces and his little nephew so

he does all that and he does all the

rapping and

stuff and it's he so okay the rule that

he has is he wants something educational

and something that makes a ridiculous

amount of noise to piss off his brother

so like that's what he does he gets them

little things that make the most noise

possible like the educational science

sets and things like that that you're

like but okay when you combine these two

ingredients it is going to explode all

over your ceiling yes yeah so like he'll

get one thing thing that's fun that

makes a lot of noise and then one thing

that's educational if it's together even

better oh okay that was a two gift that

wasn't that you needed that all to fit

in one gift cuz that's a tall order it

is to for it to be educational and

annoying every time and he'll usually

also get them something spooky and weird

that will just be weird I had a boss who

once spot all of the women in her family

pocket

vibrators oh my God I don't know where I

thought you were going with that but

it's it went to a very different place

and not everyone realized what they were

oh no like someone was like cuz I think

she was like oh yeah I got everyone a

personal massager like something like

that someone girl was like oh thank God

my back's been so

tight nope I was going to make a joke

I'm going to leave it I'm GNA leave it

I love my family so much and I don't

know

if that's a comfort level I have

absolutely not of giving everyone their

own personal

vibrators absolutely not Noom mm nope no

not into that okay so this is not a

podcast where we just sit and talk about

our favorite holiday traditions but I

we're pocket vibrators we're pocket

vibrators maybe that is your favorite

holiday tradition they do come up more

often no we're to talk about yeah so

tell me about your Christmas read today

we're reviewing O Christmas

Fling by Franchesca Penn okay um it's

short it's I think it's like 170 pages

so it's like a very quick holiday

read um something that I also thoroughly

enjoyed about this book the main

character is a Confident Woman oh I like

that yes which like I know sounds small

but but there's a point where like she

goes to the holiday party and when she's

walking up to the holiday party she's

like I know I look incredible she's like

this dress is working for me the stylus

nailed my hair like I am a Vibe right

now and I loved that energy because it's

normally

like well I tried so hard to look pretty

and hopefully he'll think I'm pretty if

I show up at this party right no one

ever really thinks I'm pretty I'm blonde

and leggy like

what everyone calls me big old blue eyes

and say I have do like a dolik

expression I'm so hideous and you're

like what is happening right or they're

like my boobs are so small I've only got

a C cup

like like okay babe whatever you

say you know exactly what I'm talking

about I do I was also thinking about um

cuz I I know I said this previously when

I was breastfeeding and my boobs like

skyrocketed in size and I was not

prepared for it at all and I was like I

don't know how to I don't know how to

big boob I just don't know

how um I have several women in my family

who do know how to big boob very well

and one of them recently had breast

reduction surgery and I found out her

size that she's now reduced to is how

large I grew to oh no and I'm like I

have a whole new level of sympathy

because she's like I have a new lease on

life yes and I'm like yes oh I was

miserable with them at that size cuz I

had no idea how to do it and she's like

this is so freeing they're so small now

my mind was blown also not what we're

here to talk about so yeah Franchesca

pen is the author of this one um it's

thoroughly enjoyed which we will

obviously be getting into more right so

so we start with the prologue and we

meet Carly Carly with two e just felt

like that was

important that is a A vibe you know

there's a difference between a Carly

with an i a Carly with two e's a Carly

with a y a Carly with an i e yep all

different all different people yes

different experiences yeah yeah very

true mhm so we uh it's dual point of

view between the whole book we start

with Carly Carly is currently pinned

against the wall by her super hot boss

who's like wearing a towel

and that is that is where we are

starting in the prologue what an open

yes so what we find out is um they had

both been at um she works for this hotel

chain he is like the CEO new new CEO

it's a family business so like he's

trying to like make sure he's earning

his spot and people respect him and

they're both up at one of the hotels in

Alaska because they were having a a

Personnel problem but then he wasn't

answering his phone so his assistant was

like can you ask Carly can you go check

on him so she's knocking on his door and

when he opens it he's in a towel and

sees her and like Yanks her in the room

and she's like pinned against the wall

and he's wearing a

towel well hello right and so like she's

like was it I was just coming to make

sure you were okay cuz you weren

answering your phone but you are very

good-looking and I'm very here for this

like she's like checking him out he's

checking her out but then he's like go

ahead and like look like it's your last

chance to back out like like almost like

speak now or forever piece cuz it seems

like we're both into what could

potentially happen but like if you're

not tell me Now's the Time yes um she

doesn't say anything and then like he

like lifts her up higher and like wraps

her legs around his waist and then she

calls him Mr Masters and because his

name is Jeremy Masters but he goes by

Remy to people that he likes and cares

about so he's like call me Remy that's

cute right I do like that nickname yeah

that's cute as silly as this might sound

I think i' never never really considered

what Remy was a nickname for I always

thought it was Remington literally what

I was just I knew a Remington who went

did he go by Remy yeah yeah so I never

thought about I never thought of Jeremy

Remy Remy cute yeah I was a big fan of

that one yeah

um we haven't even got there we

haven't can can you tell me so I can't

laugh with you so he like rips her

panties to shreds as one does which is

like he like rips in frout the book

where she's like I stopped wearing

panties I give a [ __ ] about in fact the

second book in this series uh the girl's

a lingerie designer and this like Cari

and Remy end up showing up and they talk

about how um the lingerie she creates is

um like easily removable and she's like

oh thank God he'll stop ripping my like

even in the second book she's still

talking about how much he rips her

underwear okay yes um but why I'm

laughing is that at one point he's like

you're be and she goes I got laser hair

removal it won't come back and I'm

like

never never in my sexual history has

anyone ever commented in the moment on

the status of my pubic

hair okay okay but in a lot of these

books there is some kind of like comment

about like oh you're bear or like oh

whatever which like yeah cuz I and I I

feel like in some books the girl in like

her internal monologue will be like my

landing strip or like something like

that but I think the full conversation

of like you're bear and she's like I get

laser hair REM that's where it gets like

okay that's why I was laughing like we

don't need to know how you became that

way we could leave it you could be like

yeah it is like you're welcome right

right like it felt enjoy it felt a

little bit more of the energy of

like I see Brenda up off exit 10 I got a

I got a discount code I can give you

right yes right um my other favorite

thing in this exchange is that the the

exact quote I wrote from the book was

you're so big you're going to mutter

M um I'm only like two sips of wine in I

know you are this is sad um you're so

big you're going to murder my coochie I

say before Crossing myself while

ignoring the fact I'm not

Catholic I'm like this is all in the

prologue I'm living that very

much um and then they [ __ ] so hard they

break the table as one does and then

he's like you're mine for the night and

then it kind of like Fades to Black is

the is the general energy that's all the

prologue Hannah just prologue woohoo

yeah um so now it's 8 months later

oh right okay yeah so that was April oh

and it's now like the the week before

the holidays okay um in that

time Cari has been promoted but they

haven't interacted at work they've been

on different floors the whole time but

with her recent promotion they have more

overlap so they're in meetings again and

so we're in Remy's point of view and

he's still very curious about her and

he's thinking back he's like yeah had

been like such a [ __ ] night cuz like I

was hoping the hotel like the the

Personnel issue wasn't a big deal but we

like we had to fire the manager Mark

like and just like what I was so like

I've always thought she was so

attractive then she knocked on my door

and I'm still very intrigued by her but

it's been eight months and we haven't

interacted and like I don't even know if

she is still into me that way but I

would definitely be into her um then as

he's like making his presentation he

catches her like I think they said

longingly staring at his crotch and he's

like and he sees it and gets so excited

and he's like hell yeah like I'm still

in the race like she might still be into

me that's so cute though it really like

does she like me I'm like her big boss

and like I'm doing this job but like

does she like me he like yes and then

she's like caught her staring at my dick

I'm

in um so then within that they're also

drawing names for like the office secret

santa ah um he draws her name and is

like oh like what am I going to do then

he calls her to his office and like this

is the first time they've interacted and

so she's like oh [ __ ] like am I in

trouble like I don't know what I did I

was just trying to like get out of this

meeting right but his dick did look

nice so um when they get to his office

he's like oh I'm just like I just wanted

to check on you like because she's like

oh like is everything okay what's going

on he's like oh I just wanted to check

on you and she's like oh like I'm not

planning on suing you like there's no

like lawsuit and then she can tell she

said the wrong thing uh yeah yeah yeah

that is very much the wrong thing and

he's like yeah if I was concerned about

that I probably would have reached out

sooner than eight months later um like

no just like wanted to like know how you

are and then she's like I'm I'm sorry

she's like I didn't mean to make it

awkward she's like I don't really know

what to do with like one night stand

protocol like I've never like had one

night stand before and then she can tell

she said the wrong thing again yeah just

digging the hole deeper but doesn't like

sees that she's digging a ho but like

doesn't necessarily understand why what

she's saying is wrong because I think

she's just trying to be like

everything's fine like yeah we had a

great night please don't feel obligated

like nothing all good here I love my job

right please don't don't don't want to

jeopardize any of that um and then he's

like getting flirtier and flirtier and

like getting in her space more and then

she's kind of like wait like as they're

kind of starting to have that like could

be a slight turning point in this cute

moment his phone rings of course right

and he um just kind of shifts modes and

is like I'll see you at the the holiday

party on on Friday kind of

energy um she then calls her twin Ron to

update him he's her bestie that she like

processes everything with it's also

right yeah Ron but it's also funny

because um Ron doesn't want the details

of her sex capades he's like can you

talk to anyone else about this and she's

like if you don't help me process this

I'm going to show up at your house and

give you more details I need

help I like her yes she's very endearing

the whole time um also worth noting but

it's not like it's something that

there's a lot of attention drawn to in

in the book um Carly is a black black

woman Remy describes her skin as the

most beautiful gingerbread color which

was a very

specific not not a shade that I normally

think of with skin because when I think

of gingerbread it tends to be more

orangey right like a like a

trump

gingerbread no o not I mean we're not

staying

there but so I can appreciate that we

are

into because

okay I watch a lot of the Great British

baking

show I go on I also do a lot of

baking I never knew you did a lot of

baking I do last week I used to be a

huge

Baker what why are you and I the same I

mean you've picked up the torch in this

decade cuz I I sure as hell dropped it

yeah what were you baking as oh oh no

last week I made

um graveyard brownies for a Halloween

get together I went to last weekend what

are graveyard Brownies so regular

brownies that are like my signature

recipe that I can make without a recipe

in front of me kind of deal I make them

all the time um but with crushed up

Oreos and some graham crackers on top

for like dirt and then graham crackers

that I wrote rip and chocolate on like

stuck up like and then I did little uh

peeps makes marshmallow

ghosts I guess you can turn anything to

a marshmallow these you really can and

so I got some of those and put them on

there as well um but anyway that's not

the point so I have made gingerbread so

there's gingerbread like soft

gingerbread and like crisp gingerbread

and they do have like different am I

thinking the wrong kind of gingerbread I

think the the one that is that is crisp

not the wrong kind that's more of a

biscuit is more of a a

brownish like it's got red undertones

but it's am I think the soft kind I

think you're thinking of like the soft

kind that almost looks like a pumpkin

bread color that is cuz I read it and I

was

like he's the way in which this is

worded he's like she clearly has

beautiful skin but the color in which

I'm picturing was more pumpkiny I think

and I was like I'm [ __ ] this up like

I'm not pict ing this properly it's more

of the crisp gingerbread I think is

probably the

color I could [ __ ] up with some

gingerbread I was literally just

thinking like man I make some [ __ ]

Kick-Ass gingerbread cookies that are

like a molasses

based um I'll bring them next time yes

thank you well I feel like I had a

friend in Nashville who'd make

like almost seemed like half Snicker

doodle half gingerbread you roll in the

that's this recipe yep it's very good I

make them every year real hyped to be a

recipient so thank you in advance for

your your cookie service um so anyway

she Carly calls her brother um her twin

to kind of process through all of this

and he's like believe it or not like not

all guys think alike I don't quite know

what's going through his head but like

more importantly what do you want to

have happen here right um which I

appreciate it as perspective cuz I feel

like there are so many books where it's

like well clearly this is what he means

so this is what you need to do and her

brother's like I don't know I don't know

not all dudes think identically like the

bigger question is what do you want to

have happen are you into this are you

not into this and so she's just like

overthinking it overthinking it just

kind of finally like calls it and goes

to bed for the night and then her phone

rings and wakes her up and it's Remy

calling her um and she didn't have his

number before ah like outside of like

probably work correspondence right right

um like a like a an extension not a

direct c a direct cell phone and so when

he calls her he's like I wanted to

apologize like our conversation got cut

short um and he's like I really like

want to finish this conversation in

person because he's like I'm trying to

figure out if we're on the same page and

I like her but like how do we do this

and um so when he's like yeah like I'd

really love to finish the conversation

in person and he's angling for an invite

to her house but his driver doesn't know

that so his driver like announces he's

like Mr Masters we've arrived at your

parents house for dinner and she's like

oh sounds like you got where you're

going have a good night and he's like

damn it damn it um but also is still a

very sweet man where um when he's about

to go in for dinner he invites the

driver in and the driver's like oh I

don't need to come in he's like no like

our staff's our family everyone's

welcome like you need to eat yeah so I

really love loved that that was his

response to him after he was annoyed

with him yeah you know what I mean that

really shows his his character yes cuz I

feel like there are so many of these

books that we read where it's like the

alpha [ __ ] and like where this was

clearly not intentional like he didn't

know you were angling for an invite but

well you're like damn it that didn't go

how I wanted it to go you still got to

eat like I'm not mad at you just it's

not that deep it's not that deep but

like speaks to high moral character

absolutely you know what I mean mhm um

so we are now going to move jump a

little bit forward to the holiday party

and this is where as I said ear like

Kari knows she's looking good mhm W I

also love she's like yeah my metabolism

that I hated as a kid she's like now I

can eat whatever I want I got legs for

days used to have Twigs these things

Rock now

like which I'm like yes be confident you

don't need to [ __ ] on yourself there's

no there's no need to [ __ ] on yourself

in all of these books so the fact that

she's like yeah didn't love all these

things about myself growing up and here

I am a confident capable woman I am [ __ ]

hot thank you very much the most

refreshing thing to read yes like thank

you Franchesca

mhm thank you um but she's looking very

good and also like wants him to take

notice of this right right it wasn't for

him it's just like an added

benefit or was it for him I

think she would maybe tell herself it

wasn't for him but it was for him you

know what I mean like yeah yeah yeah

yeah I wanted to feel good but also if

this specific person gives me a lot of

attention because of this I wouldn't be

upset right yeah yeah yeah yeah um and

the I've never been it well one the the

companies I've worked for have never had

the structure right so maybe it's

something that happens more readily but

not only did they do Secret Santa

they're doing Secret Santa scavenger

hunts where you then hid the gift in the

office and then you had to like do clues

which I also respect that she's like

yeah my secret Santa is his like older

assistant she doesn't want to search for

this I put the gift card on her desk and

told her where to find it no need to

make the older woman search but she gets

a little like note that like has a

little poem about like meeting him in

his office and she's like oh like they

said not to hide gifts on the executive

floor so I guess it'll be empty um and

when she gets up there it's just him

there's no gift he said I've brought you

a dick in a box like that's what I'm

imagining he's like I did get you a gift

and it's just his dick in a box it does

cut to his point of view and he part of

the reason he asked her to up there was

to apologize because he forgot to get

her a gift um but then it does work in

his favor and they [ __ ] on his desk have

a great time and then go back to the

party right and I think at this this

will be relevant later but she makes a

joke at some point about she's like well

I spent .7% of my annual salary on this

gift so like I expect like something

like that and then later in the book

where he's like yeah well so like 0 7%

of my annual salary so you have $7,000

to get yourself a

gift and the amount of time I spent

mathing that on my phone I'm trying to

do that right now and I hate it um I

believe his salary would be 10

million if

77 I'm comfortable with that well

because 07 would be right cuz 7% would

be 7 a

70th right so it would be 0 Z and then

you had to add extra zeros I a friend

posted yesterday and she was

like if God gave me the skills of math

he knew I'd be unstoppable like whatever

wasn't like I'd be too powerful i' be

too powerful um I will never be I will

never be that powerful with my current

math levels no girl math I'll I will

knock out do you know about girl math

you know about girl math well no my

thought was more of yeah Hannah I think

when the whole basis of the math is

predicated on justifying whatever you

want we can all Thrive at that

math she's like

you mean the math that isn't real math

the math where you literally don't have

to do any

math you can just go okay well it only

costs $20 so if I use it every day yep

for 20 days it's only a dollar a day

right and if I use it past that I'm

making money

yes the making money is my favorite

aspect of girl MTH yes thank you for

that um but regardless he makes a [ __ ]

ton of money yes he makes a lot of money

they [ __ ] they go back to the party but

then he's like definitely watching her

the rest of the night interacting with

everyone and then finally he just gets

like so over it he calls her and he's

like we're leaving in 15 minutes and

she's like where we going and he's like

we need food taking you we to the best

pancakes in town she okay so she follows

him back to his house I was going to say

the best pancakes are at his house are

they not they are yeah yeah they they

very much are and she's like looking

around and she's like I thought you said

I was getting pancakes he's like you are

getting pancakes then he like throws

like a pizza box on the table and she's

like I thought I was getting pancakes

he's like in the morning you are getting

pancakes and she's like he tricked me

like you sneaky bastard like you walked

in willingly it didn't feel like that

big of a trick but still very endearing

um and then I feel like that was another

Fade to Black like there's like there's

a decent amount of sex in this and

there's a decent amount of like alluded

to sex right double the sex right half

the reading

time can just allude to it I can fill in

some details on the back

end the next morning she wakes up and

like finds a little note that's like

there's toiletries and like clothes for

you to wear in the bathroom like I've

like I'm washing your clothes for you or

whatever but her clothes are not

available she has to wear whatever is in

the bathroom right which is like his

T-shirt right so she's like this is

feeling more and more like I'm here for

a while like I can't leave right he has

my clothes it's feeling very much like

he's like if I can just get her here and

then just keep her here maybe she won't

notice and like she'll stay forever a

little bit of that energy which she also

acknowledges where she's like oh no he

trapped me like

and you're like willingly he willingly

trapped you right and so then when she

goes out and she's just like noticing

how nice his apartment is and she's like

oh like I bet you make all the girls

pancakes like and kind of a jealous like

bite like but still playful yeah like

playful but I'd say also kind of like

testing the space like oh like okay what

are you going to say like how's how's

that going to go and he's like well I've

lived here for a year and I've only had

sex with one person in the last year and

given that you're here right now the

only room that's been christened is my

bedroom last

night a and she's like oh like I think

he's like I'm I'm too busy working like

it's not one of those books where he's

like I'm the CEO of a multi-billion

dollar

Corporation who was so disciplined to

get here and now I don't work that hard

like you know what I mean where like

there are somewhere I'm like I don't get

how I know I know that your job is not

the point of this book but a lot lot of

books where you're you're kind of

like what they kind of make it they make

it important or make it a point to be

like um you know he basically the

company runs itself now like yeah like I

got the systems in place and now like

I'm like everyone works for me running

my company versus people that are like

actually like doing their job boots on

the ground actually working yes people

that like have earned their title in the

SE suite and not like right nepotism

positions just settled in it yes even

though the Remy got his job because it

is the family company but in that way

where it seems he's very aware of like

not wanting to be that boss like wanting

like wanting people to know he earned it

and he is a very hard worker right so

he's like I haven't really had time

because I've been working yeah you've

seen me like I've been working one ,000%

and then he puts her on his dining table

and pours maple syrup on her

[ __ ] okay and if that's what you're into

let no man stop you yeah that I'm happy

for you that just sounds sticky yep in a

way that I'm not that into like it makes

me concerned for like UTI

issues yeast infections like I guess I

really thought about it entering her

person well I

mean I I was thinking not to get too

graphic here but like you know pour a

little on the mound and gravity works

like it just trickles not like it just

trickles not like a turkey

baster it

trickles I just thought gravity would do

I didn't mean that he was shooting it up

China

I'm Gonna Leave it I'm Gonna Leave it I

could I could

expand but I won't I see where you meant

to go with that and I see how I took it

to a very different place and I

apologized to everyone that I talked

about a turkey baster filled with maple

syrup full of maple

syrup oh no yeah but he's like let's see

if like my dining table is sturdier in

the hotel

tables and it was yeah we it was so a

little bit later they're lounging at

this point and she's kind of like

where's all of your Christmas

decorations like you have nothing you

don't even have a tree and he's like oh

yeah well like my my parents are taking

off and like going on a tropical

vacation and my sister's out of the

country and so like I I took a couple

days for the weekend but like I wasn't

really going to celebrate and do the

holidays and things like that and she's

like

like what do you mean blasphemy like

what like that you you need the like in

a way we're like almost taking care of

him like wanting to make sure that like

he's not alone and by himself so she's

like let's like do all like the fun

holiday things and he's like okay well

like if you agree to spend the weekend

here with me doing all of the fun

holiday things that I'm I'm in and that

way you won't worry about it on

Christmas Day when you're like with your

family and she's like okay so

like get gets gets the Buy in yeah more

of tricking her to stay he's like nailed

it yes and when I say tricking she's

clearly very willing yeah yeah right it

feels more

um like just not smooth like he's

obvious with it of like what he's trying

to do and it's just

cute rather than being like devious and

manipulative it's just like a buddy cuz

it seems like every time she agrees he's

like got it like yes like hell yeah did

it again got her to stay and you're like

but she wanted to stay yeah but like he

doesn't seem to like put all that

together 1,000% that's cute

um the he then is like tells her she has

$77,000 for her gift and she's like

that's way too much money and he's like

well it's he's like this isn't because

I'm sleeping with you he's like honestly

I this is something that like I might

just make a tradition out of and like I

can bless an employee each year and like

but he's like but you're that person

this year so I need you to pick some

some stuff and so she picks out a uh a

purse that I looked it up it was like a

a $3,200 purse I'm like you know what

good for you babe and she's like and

then I spent the rest paying my property

taxes which oh my God I love that which

apparently he was then like annoyed that

she was spending the money on her

property taxes and she's like no but if

you think about it the money I've been

saving for my property taxes I don't

have to spend which I can can now put

that money towards a vacation and he's

like okay well if it if it helps you

take a vacation then yes you can use my

money for your property taxes but at one

point he like asks what her like ideal

vacation would be and she's like I'd

really love to like spend like the

holidays one year like in like a cozy

cabin and the mountains and she's like

it could be Montana or Vermont or

Colorado like I don't care and she's

just seeing this look on his face where

like she's like that's a weird reaction

like why I'm was just telling him what I

was into but it's because he's there and

he's like that's my dream vacation too

oh my God we have the same dream

vacation and she's like is his face

okay it seems like they are both

oblivious to each other in different

ways to where like she's oblivious that

he is super into her and like wants her

to stay and is like all about it yes and

he's oblivious that like she's just

having a good time and like he doesn't

have to work that hard yes that's really

cute it that Dynamic is adorable he gets

really excited about all of these things

but like she's like oh yeah we're just

doing whatever like it's like golden

retriever energy a little bit yeah yeah

it is a little bit of golden retriever

energy um but a golden retriever who

looks like Jesse

Williams okay is that that's his name

right the guy who's playing toppert on

one um only murders in the

building light-skinned blue blue eyes I

think very attractive man

noted yes okay um I'm I find Jesse

Williams very attractive you're like I

don't know who you're talking about I

have no idea I'm going to look it up

later yeah I'm G to have to show you a

picture and then I think you'll be like

oh I know exactly who that actor is I

probably will yeah was he on gr's

Anatomy at one point oh my God I know

exactly who you're talking about okay

yes super attractive yes I'm like I

don't remember what color his eyes are

soon as you said Grace Anatomy I was

like Jesse William

yes yeah I got it in fact I thought it

was Jesse Williams on the cover of the

book at first which did did endear me to

pick it up

faster she's like damn it Franchesca you

got me Franchesca you and I are going to

be besties at this point let's go girl

that's awesome um so there's then just

like this full Montage of them being

cute like she took a nap and he went and

picked up all of the supplies for like

all of the she's like cuz she was like

we're going to decorate trees and make

eggnog and like Christmas cookies yeah

make cookies so like he she made a full

list of everything they'd need and then

when she was napping he went and picked

all of it up um which I just thought was

like so endearing and then he goes and

picks up Italian from his like favorite

restaurant and she's like this is so

good if it's this good now I can't

imagine how good this would be fresh and

he's like oh there's a location right by

the office I'll take you for lunch next

week and she's like

yeah how's that going to work my like

bosses bosses bosses bosses boss and

he's like it's not that many

bosses but like she's like I don't think

I don't think we'll be able to do that

that subtly and he's like okay let's

make a bet like I can get you to lunch

there next week and she's like so what

are the details of the BET and it like I

think it was if he won he got a quickie

wherever like that he could just like at

the time and place of his choosing or

whatever and if he lost I don't know he

had to like buy her another expensive

gift or like something like that and

she's like okay whatever either way I

win that sounds like a win-win for her

right it really it it's a win-win for

everyone he gets to buy her something

that brings win win win yes yes

1,000% um it continues and they like

they're still being like super cute but

I think this is the shift where they're

like both starting to feel like it's

like more romantic and less like oh

we're having a [ __ ] for the weekend

and put up a Christmas tree during it

and more like oh we're a couple spending

the holidays together and like neither

of them really like acknowledging that

or having a conversation about it um but

the feelings are developing yes and I'd

say Remy is also like I want to know if

we're on the same page but I don't want

to like break the spell so like yeah we

don't have to have that conversation

right now we can have it in a few days

um but both of them are kind of a

feeling that like this is feeling a

little more couply and romantic and

we're enjoying it but just not

acknowledging it right neither wants to

be the first to say it

essentially yes yeah so the holiday

party I believe if my mathing is mathing

when we know my mathing does not math um

I believe the holiday party was on like

a Friday night and then they spent the

weekend together so it's now Wednesday

okay of the following week and they

haven't spoken since she left his house

okay um which also apparently she like

snuck out she did an Irish goodbye an

Irish well he was FaceTiming his parents

on vacation and so like while he can't

really do anything she was like she was

like he pretended to be annoyed but like

it's Sunday night and we both had to

work the next day so in that way where

you're like was he actually like was it

a cute playful annoyance or was it like

was he actually like wait a minute yes

but in her head she's like

it's Sunday at 8:00 we like the work

week starts tomorrow you know right so

it's now Wednesday the following week

and they're at the all team meeting and

like as the meeting is ending Remy's

like oh yeah um if for anyone who like

doesn't have lunch plans today like

lunch on me and then he's like and um I

got to go soon but um pick a number

between 1 and 50 whoever gets it right

I'll like I'll

drive and then he's sitting there and

he's like she better get this [ __ ]

number right like

so do you think she got it right I do

yeah she did um I'm not she did it would

be really funny if she didn't and he was

stuck with like some [ __ ] from the

office like that would be really funny

but it wouldn't move the story kind of

hoping that's what was going to happen

where like she guesses the number right

then he's like hey if you want to come

up to my office I just like need to grab

my keys in my bag and then I'm good to

go so when they get up to his office he

like closes the door and he's like if

you got that number wrong I was going to

be so pissed and she's like you mean how

you talked about how two of your

favorite sports players of all time both

were the number 33 and one of them

professionally retired it yeah I I

listened I listen like I I couldn't have

[ __ ] that one up right um and then he

fingers her on the way to the restaurant

sure yeah as you do right um and when

she sees all of the the details of the

restaurant she's like oh you you won

this like didn't dawn on her that ah

other people could be in attendance at

the lunch and he could still win

it he did outplay her he did that good

for him right in a cute way um but then

she when they get to the restaurant

she's like I need to sit not next to him

I need to sit at the other end of the

table and then he like got a call and

had to leave early and like they they

didn't interact again after that he just

fingered her on the way there which I'm

like you know I do get the slightly

mixed messages where you spent the whole

weekend

together that was that ended on Sunday

night you haven't spoken right and then

he wants to drive you but fingers you on

the way there like I get the what is

this right like he could have texted he

could have called in between he could

have said like you know I like you like

yes like we just keep not having

the necessary conversations right

because now it's four days after

that and they still haven't really

spoken and so Carly's like I'm not

waiting around I'm going to go live my

life it's now Christmas Eve at this

point and her friends are like Hey we're

we're going out tonight she's like I

don't really I don't love it and she's

like I'm not really that person and

they're like we don't give a [ __ ] we're

going out get get ready right so she

goes clearly doesn't drink just says to

the bartender she's like pour me a

double he's like a double of what she's

like [ __ ] if I know you're the bartender

figure it

out no don't don't ever do that don't

ever do that and so the funny thing is

that he's like super sassy back to her

and so and she'd ordered the first round

so for her and the two friends and he's

like it's $32 and so she's like I

counted out exactly $32 and handed it to

him and went no tip

because he'd like been such a dick ever

do that in the book he thought it like

he he thought it was funny he owned the

bar and was like we find out he was

pissed because one of his bartenders

like no show no call no show to shift so

he was annoyed and like appreciated that

she called him out on like just having a

[ __ ] attitude where she's like [ __ ] You

I'm the customer like customers always

right make a drink I don't know like

that is the exception to the rule y'all

1,000% former bartender as I was reading

it I was like that could have gone very

wrong in several ways so much um but he

found her really funny and then because

he owns the bar her and her friends

drank free for the rest of the night but

she doesn't normally drink so she walks

up at some point and she's like I need

water and he's like it's only 10:00

she's like are you trying to [ __ ]

kill me

like I need to hydrate I cannot keep

drinking I know enough to know I'm in

trouble yes yes so then she is like so

drunk all she wants to see is Remy right

so she calls him um and he's sitting on

his couch missing her but like tired and

he's like I've been going non-stop like

just been put putting out work emergency

after work emergency I would love to see

her I'm bummed that I haven't and then

she calls and she's clearly drunk and

he's like do you need me to come get you

and she's like no cuz I would try and

give you a [ __ ] on the drive and

that's not safe send an

Uber

what an Insight oh my God I love it and

then he's like I could drive there

faster but she's not wrong it probably

is sa her so he calls her an

Uber that's so good right and then is um

like waiting at the the entry to his

building for her right and they like

jump each other and are very into

it um and then she just like passes out

and so the next morning it's now

Christmas Day her alarm goes off that

she just like forgotten to turn off um

her like work alarm and he wakes up and

catches it and like turns off her phone

so she can actually sleep in the morning

um but then he sees a text that came

through from her brother um where he's

like hey stop by your house and you

weren't there like did you but then like

is mentioning mention something about

like did you decide what you're going to

do about Remy or like something like

that on the text then Remy's like well

that's my name um he's like don't really

want to be this person but I'm about to

be this person and starts reading

through the thread where she was like

yeah I've decided I'm going to update my

resume and he's like oh [ __ ] like in a

way where Remy has clearly liked her

this whole time right um but is now

like I don't want her to quit her job or

[ __ ] up her career or any of that like I

want to have a conversation and like get

on the same page but I need to know what

page I want to be on and like right just

kind of that like well I'm also

imagining that he's like oh no like did

I push her past where she was

comfortable and now she feels like she

has to leave like I think it was more of

like a I want to do right by

her yes and that

like before we have any conversations I

need to make sure my head is fully

screwed on straight so that I I can do

right by her and like she doesn't like

quit her job and things like that before

I don't want her to ruin her career

before we we fully know what this is

right right uh oh yes I think I know

where we're going now that you said that

yeah um where do you think we're going

well I think maybe we're going to a

place where he says like

well I don't want you to ruin your

career like I want you know whatever

whatever and she misunderstands that to

be like don't quit your job for me babe

and he's that's a guess that's not what

he means but that's what she receives

and it causes

a well I guess what we're about to find

out I'm doing hand motions you are

that's that was a great guess though

um not quite but also not like the most

far off right where um when she does

wake up in the morning he's like made

her breakfast in bed and she's like he's

very sweet but very stoic like kind of

the like passion and the sex and like

the being all over her like

that's not really there the romance of

it yeah it's like he's like hey I made

you breakfast and she's like oh okay and

like thinks he's gonna like kiss her and

maybe get back in bed and he's like all

right I'm going to go clean up the

kitchen and she's like wait what like I

okay am I misinterpreting this and then

like she gets in the shower and she's

like excited to see like her toothbrush

that he gave her from the their weekend

is like still in the toothbrush holder

next to his so she's like okay so like

he's not trying to just like get rid of

me but like get in the shower he's like

kind of like a let me help bathe you and

but like she's like okay like it's

things are about to get sexy nope she's

like it was sweet but like I could tell

he was not trying to take it there so

now she's like what is did I was I

interpreting this wrong like that whole

kind of energy right makes signals did

he just like was he just okay with me

coming over because I was drunk and like

it was just a thing or like was it

yeah yeah she's questioning more and

then he gives her a bracelet like which

is she he gives her a box it's a

Tiffany's box and she's like you already

got me a really expensive gift and he's

like no that was your boss fulfilling

his secret santa obligation like this is

Remy getting Carly a gift that I wanted

to get her um and it's a bracelet that

has three little charms on it um that's

beautiful and she loves it and it's very

thoughtful of her and then he is like

hey I know we need to

talk can I have a few days like can we

talk in January can we talk in the new

year I just I just need a few days and

she's

like okay like just still trying to

figure this out then he's like okay well

I called you an Uber to take you to your

parents house no and she's like Remy oh

he doesn't want me here she's like he

must have just viewed me as a fling and

like is was just trying to enjoy that

element of it and I'm was turning into

something it's not but I may as well

enjoy the sping for what it's worth for

as long as it's going to last until we

have that conversation so she's like

okay well after I go to my parents like

do you want me to bring you a plate and

he was agreeable to that so I think

she's just like trying to figure it out

right and she like gets to Christmas and

like her twin brother is like that's a

nice bracelet that you got on there

haven't seen that one who gave you that

what what is who is the person who gave

that what are they to you like and she's

like get off my [ __ ] back like if I

knew I would tell you yes and her

brother is like getting annoyed at like

how Remy is treating his sister right

right right and at some point I forget

when but like Remy owns he's like yeah

if anyone were like if my sister were in

this situation I would not love how my

how I viewed my sister as being treated

either right

right um she ends up going back over to

Remy's that night with the plate of food

and he's like okay he's like trying to

get himself sorted and he's like we

don't need to be a sto

but we also don't need to jump her he's

like try and land somewhere in the

middle Remy like be sweet and thoughtful

be kind and open but don't [ __ ] her yeah

don't just stick your hand down her

pants as soon as she walks in the door

say hi first man you got

this a warm greeting would not be

misplaced like come on buddy yes um and

he does get a chance to clarify he's

like hey for the record like I wasn't

trying to kick you out earlier I I

didn't want you to miss the holidays

with your parents and I like recognized

that like it didn't necessarily come off

that way he's like now that you have no

place to be I'd loved if you spent the

night and like stayed here with me but I

didn't want you to miss Christmas with

your family because you were here um

which like helpful context I have

explain right and then at some point she

asks if he wants to go Sam's

condom um which she's never gone without

protection before he's never gone with

that protection before and he's kind of

like slightly taken aback by it but he's

super into her and he's like I still not

100% sure of where this is going long

term is it shitty of me to say

yes and then if it doesn't go anywhere

like is that shitty um and then like the

pause and him processing that she's like

oh never mind never mind and then he's

like oh [ __ ] now she feels weird about

it and it like just becomes like that

whole sort of yeah situation and then he

takes a moment he's like this is about

being in this moment he's like it is a

special occasion it is a holiday he's

like this is me showing that I trust her

in this

moment more than like it needs to be a

like this means longterm we're going to

be together like and I think when he

processed it like that then they [ __ ]

and it's great and they're like it's a

solidifying [ __ ] yes I'd say this is the

solidifying [ __ ] well I'm thinking too

that like that would be a big deal on

even a different level for him because

he has all this money 1 he's a boss like

it I mean when and I think he said he's

like growing up the way I grew up he's

like wrap it up was my middle name kind

of like yes and I so I think that is

also part of what he was reconciling is

that like there's more at stake with the

level of visibility he holds in the

world right and also reconciling that

maybe he likes her even more than he

thought he did did if he's even

considering that you know

1,000% um and that is I think when he

realizes that he is very much falling

for her and like knew he liked her but I

think knowing you like someone and

recognizing when that liking starts to

hold more weight yes can be such a scary

shift it's a vulnerable place to be when

you're just starting to recognize it and

you don't know if the other person is

with you in that shift it's very

like yep cuz I remember the first time

my husband told me that he loved me he

was like you know I really

love

this and I was like yeah you know what

me too and I really love you and he was

like oh thank God I love you

too um I'm pretty sure Vance had looked

at me and he was like I'm more than like

you and I was like I'm more than like

you too and I think we said that to each

other for a couple of days and at one

point when he said it and I was like I'm

more than like you too he's like I love

you and I'm like oh okay there it is got

it found it good good we made it he was

so awkward about it I really

love

this I love it so much I really do I can

fully picture that yeah like that

doesn't feel like a jump like I'm like

that just feels like a very authentic to

mat experience right yes so it's now I

don't know this timeline sometime during

the holidays we're jumping we're jumping

they haven't had the their official talk

and conversation yet um I don't know if

it's the next day a couple days later

but Remy is sitting at his desk and um

like a unlabeled envelope is before him

and when he opens it is that a

resignation no it's photos of them oh

no yeah like no photos of them like of

her outside his room in Alaska that are

timestamped photos of her car and his

and his like um home parking lot at his

complex like right better time stamp for

like showing how long her car was there

um photos of when she was drunkenly

getting out of the Uber and he was

waiting for her all of these photos oh

no then Remy gets a phone

call it's the GM from

Alaska Mark it's Mark it's Mark from

Alaska um who it's Jake from State Farm

like just the way you said that but also

all right you'll I'll okay so

he decide Mark is trying to Blackmail

Remy and Carly right right um and he's

like do you know how expensive it is to

move to and from Alaska if you don't

give me if you don't give me my Miss

salary and the moving expenses both ways

these photos will be leaked and I'm

laughing cuz buddy go bigger yes that is

why I was I like aim higher Mark buddy

we have leverage everybody knows you

start high come on man I also want to

know that man was fired in April of the

previous year right this is now like

December January so he held on to the

pictures from April for

eight nine months well but if you think

about it though there wouldn't have been

additional photos because with like

having the photos from Alaska then all

of the recent photos would make it look

like they'd been been together that

whole time been together that whole

time and so Remy's like freaking out but

I'm right there yeah my my first thought

reading that was like aim higher Mark

yeah for real I don't know what your

salary was but I feel like if all you

want is your salary and moving

expenses your bar is too low bro yeah

seriously I want better for you mark

like come on man Mark if you're going to

Blackmail people do it better that's

that's my big critique yeah do it with

conviction

man so Remy calls Carly up to his office

and he's still freaking out and is like

shows her the photos on his desk and

she's like do you think I she's like did

you think I had anything to do with this

and he's like no I know you didn't have

anything to do with this it's [ __ ]

Mark um and then he's just kind of

ranting and processing but in that way

where it's like can't believe that like

my career could like be [ __ ] up over

all this like if I could go back in time

and like change it and like take it all

back I would and Carly's just sitting

there like hearing him say all of this

and pro like and she's like oh he wishes

he could take me back he wishes he could

go back in time and not sleep with like

all of those things so she's distraught

because she was going

to update her resume so she could be

with him right um and instead just sits

down at his desk and opens word and um

as he's just like going off and like not

even really paying attention she types

up her two weeks notice and backdates it

oh so like it's when the he hears the

printer going that it kind of like snaps

him out of it and then he like looks

over and sees that she's visibly upset

and she's like there's my two weeks

notice it's back dat it's that should

really help your career goded and just

like leaves right you won't have to

worry about it anymore mhm no more

blackmail issue yes so

long three months

later yeah we Remy we jump three months

he's still blocked on everything um but

apparently knows that she has a job at

another hotel chain because he logged

into his assistant LinkedIn account

while she was at lunch so he could and

then he's like and then he's like I

wanted to message her but I didn't want

anyone else to get blocked so like bless

it you're so desperate to talk to this

girl you were going to message her from

your assistance

LinkedIn profile his assistant who's

like an older woman right yeah I think

he has two but still um just made me

laugh cuz I'm like okay so 3 months

later um yeah kly has taken a job at a

less prestigious Hotel chain but got a

far higher position in that got it so

she's doing well in her career but is

like has just moved on and has blocked

him and is like no need to go back there

um I don't need to hear again what a

mistake I am yes yeah and so Remy is at

work and his parents drop in um which

his dad used to be the CEO like his

parents seem like really they they seem

like cool parents you know yeah yeah

they're not regular parents you get it

so they sit down and they're like okay

what's been going on and he's like I'm

getting blackmailed and this is the

situation and apparently he like paid

off Mark the first time because that's a

mistake Remy he'll always come back for

more which he's aware of but he then

hired a pi to dig his owner on Mark but

his whole thought process was he didn't

want to chance Mark getting unhappy and

releasing the photos until Cari could

like get established somewhere else so

he was like or I'm not going to stay in

this pattern long term but I am willing

to like pay that money so that she can

transition well and we don't have that

like black cloud over our heads that's

very thoughtful yes so he's telling his

parents about this and like and his

parents are like sitting there and like

looking more and more relieved and he's

like what is happening they're like oh

thank God we thought you hated us after

we went on vacation for the holidays we

left with one son came back to another

didn't know why you were pissed just

heartbreak we can work through that my

dude let's do it

they're like were you that mad we went

to Hawaii or wherever the [ __ ] like oh

God like why didn't you tell us we would

have stayed home like yes and they're

like oh you're just

heartbroken what a

relief you'll be fine

1,000% that's awesome and then his dad's

like cool give me this I'll he's like

there's always going to be people trying

to extort you at this level of power

give me the the envelope my child I'll

handle this no worries kiddo yes yes so

then I do believe it's a couple weeks

after that because Cari is at her job

and um it is now April in the

anniversary of when they hooked up in

Alaska and her assistant is like oh

here's your mail and this package was

was with it and when she opens the

package it's another charm for her

bracelet from Tiffany's and there's a

little note that's like something to the

effect of like while it he considered it

like their oneyear anniversary from like

when everything happened between them it

was also apparently her

birthday so he's like you failed to

mention that historically so like happy

birthday and like here's this charm and

so before she chickens out she decides

to call him um on his work line and he's

like so relieved and he's like will you

please unblock me I have so many things

I want to tell you about and she's like

I'll think about it like not there yet

but I'll think about it okay so we're

beginning to thaw the ice well and then

that night she's like laying in bed at

home and she's

like text them unblocked and then her

phone rings immediately of course right

um and so then he's just pretty much

trying to like explain like hey this is

what happened this is like I I would

like to pursue something is trying to

clarify the situation she's like I'm not

100% there yet but like I appreciate

this let me like keep pondering and

thinking on it right right give me some

space to like continue to work through

it yes cuz he's been working through it

this whole time knowing his intentions

and like knowing that he wants to be

with her and knowing that like he's

protecting her in a way by not reaching

out yet yes and in her head she was

nothing more than a fling at any point

right so she was like okay we like we

cut our losses and I just moved on

um and so now they are like in this

space where she's still kind of

reconciling um but Remy's just like it

doesn't hurt as bad not being able to

talk to her or not talking to her every

day because I know I can call her at any

point that I want like there's an open

line of communication and she'll respond

if I reach out um so then she calls him

I think and is like okay I think we

should date and he's like hell yeah and

then she's like other

people and he's like wait the [ __ ] like

no no no no no no no yeah he's like

that's not where I wanted this

conversation to go and she's like listen

everything was like so so charged and

emotional and we're both very busy

people and was it the experience was it

each other like was it just the

proximity and access 1,000% that and so

she's like let's see let's let's date

other people and he's like okay for how

long she's like until we have the

answers and he's like don't like that

that is not sustainable so he's like

fine I'll go on one date every other

week for two months I will give you four

dates total and then I'm coming for you

and you better hydrate

she's like hydrate he's like you will be

naked in my bedroom he's like you

[ __ ] heard me hydrate I'll go on the

dates if that's what like I need to do

to make you happy but like this is

stupid as [ __ ] I want to be with you

fine and the dates are not going well

I'm sure they're not like he's checking

a box he's not actually dating 1,000%

like the first girl like after dinner it

may have even been before dinner he was

like I'm not doing this but his one of

his assistant it was her sority sister

and he's like do you want me to call

Yolanda my assistant night on me she has

one of my credit cards you guys go out

so sorry not into you but like have a

have a fantastic night on my

dime that's so cute it really was

endearing and the second date doesn't go

well either um and her date isn't going

her dates aren't going well

either I'm still a little confused she's

helping throw a party for some famous

quote unquote famous person um at the

hotel chain but she doesn't work at the

hotel chain anymore the other Hotel

chain no I was a little confused okay

well there's a party for a famous person

there's a party Remy is there with his

third date she is there because she was

helping throw the party okay um and her

and her friends were like playing a game

and one of the cards that was drawn was

like tell about like the best sex of

your life and so she's sitting there and

she's like yeah well it wasn't a like

one night so much as a person and like

all of this stuff not knowing Remy's at

this party and Remy's date and like he

they're standing there hearing this

whole conversation and then Remy's dat's

like wow I'd love to find a man like

that what do you think Tim and he's like

apparently I am

one and then like Carly sees him and

it's like oh [ __ ] like he just heard me

talking about our sex life very

positively and so she kind of like

removes herself cuz she's embarrassed he

follows her out onto the balcony and

they bang yep they have a second a

morsel ifying [ __ ] yeah if you will

um and then really I don't remember if

anything else happens but in the epilog

he

proposes the next Christmas cute um when

they're on their Mountain getaway trip

to wherever very C I believe and that's

where it

is the end that's very cute right yeah

that's how I felt the entire time like

justtin a what a lovely straightforward

Christmas holiday read that we didn't

get overly complicated we didn't need to

get overly complicated there wasn't any

like soap opera feel or major drama it

was very much like a believable

relationship beginning honestly my two

biggest qualms Mark needed to aim higher

with his blackmail

agreed that is yeah I just really so

caught up on that the three months I

felt like oh yeah cuz we've had this

conversation about like Megan Quinn

books where sometimes the conflict in a

Megan Quinn book feels like a bigger

conflict yes I'm hitting my tapping

Brandon on the head while I say that um

I making Quinn books it can feel like

it's a bigger conflict but then it feels

like they resolve it by the next day

it's like less than 24 hours L like and

we're all over it oh I don't know if I

forgave him quite yet like that waso a

little too soon um where in a way where

I'm like you know give it a week give it

like two weeks of like make him work for

it yes and I think this one where he was

clearly willing to do the work but I was

like three months like it three months

felt like too much time for for me for

cuz this one was more predicate on like

just a misc communic

right you know um so I think those are

my my the biggest qualms I have I mean I

can appreciate the symmetry of the like

year anniversary from when they hooked

up the first time and that kind of stuff

like I can appreciate the symmetry of

that but I also absolutely hear what

you're saying of like well three months

is a long time and especially for them

to like still be that caught on each

other and have not moved on at all like

it just yeah it seemed like maybe one or

two months from what ostensibly was a

fling truly like yeah they were banging

and hanging out for like a weekend

basically and so to then be caught up on

that for 3 months well then especially

when the with the whole thing kind of

being no it wasn't just a fling I've

been into you since since Alaska right

you're like okay so you've been into

them for 8 months and you were that into

them and couldn't find a way to resolve

the like sooner right yeah

right that's my biggest issue okay I can

understand that so what what's our

rating skill gingerbread

men yeah gingerbread men that's

gingerbread um how many juner bread men

we go

on seven for the 0.07% for the Seven

Grand I would say

I'd say like four out of seven okay in a

way where

like I okay I thoroughly enjoyed this

book it did and it didn't change my life

right like it's one that I'm like this

is a great simple straightforward

holiday read doesn't need to be more

complicated doesn't need to be more than

that but also isn't one that I'm like

that is going to sit with me that I'm

going to keep pondering on right not one

you're necessarily going to go back to

but when you enjoyed in the moment yeah

I enjoyed it in the moment I enjoyed it

enough that I read the next book in the

series right

um but yeah and then with my qualms

factored in I think four out of seven

gingerbread men okay you know

what four gingerbread men but one of

them like is missing an

arm like from Shrek yeah okay yes okay

fair enough final

offer not my gumd drop

buttons oh

no which we will have cartoon movies on

in the background all the time now just

having a baby putting Shrek on in the

background one that movie is still so

funny yes it is but

two that's a movie that I hadn't

realized how much time had passed where

I'm like man the graphics on this movie

look a little dated and I'm like well

yeah Chelsea it's been 20 years yeah it

makes sense that it's a little dated

yeah yeah yeah oh not the gun drop

buttons okay that's really sad

drop let us know what you think about

this book if you've read it share your

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Kindle unlimited nice and we hope to see

you soon yeah enjoy your holidays y'all

bye smut [ __ ]

bye well that's it for this week's smut

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